How are those resolutions going?
We are coming up to the end of the first month of the new year.
Did you make any New Years resolutions?
Did you choose to set goals instead of resolutions?
What ever you want to call them, the start of a new year is an opportunity to try new things or break a bad habit.
We all start out with the best intentions.
Time to make a change.
Lose weight.
Stop smoking.
Travel more.
Worry less.
But why can't we stay committed to our plan. Why do so many people give up before the month is over?
I was reading an article in the Mindfulness Journal; A 52 Week Planner, written by Amanda Altman, who suggests that the problem may be in a lack of planning. She states that more than just wanting to make a change, one must explore "the situations you regularly find yourself in". You need to examine the triggers of your behavior that keep you stuck in old patterns and prevent you from making changes/keeping your resolutions.
Did you make any New Years resolutions?
Did you choose to set goals instead of resolutions?
What ever you want to call them, the start of a new year is an opportunity to try new things or break a bad habit.
We all start out with the best intentions.
Time to make a change.
Lose weight.
Stop smoking.
Travel more.
Worry less.
But why can't we stay committed to our plan. Why do so many people give up before the month is over?
I was reading an article in the Mindfulness Journal; A 52 Week Planner, written by Amanda Altman, who suggests that the problem may be in a lack of planning. She states that more than just wanting to make a change, one must explore "the situations you regularly find yourself in". You need to examine the triggers of your behavior that keep you stuck in old patterns and prevent you from making changes/keeping your resolutions.
In the article, she shares tips from Bryan Aston, LMSW and Director of Training at Mindful Psychotherapy Services in New York City, that may help you stay focused on your goals and find success in keeping your resolutions.
After reading the article I immediately wanted to share this information with you. This article was a good reminder that in order to create change you need a plan. If you have a plan - a way to break your BIG goal down into smaller, attainable stages - you will have more success making the changes in your life that you want to create. Here are my thoughts on some of his tips.
After reading the article I immediately wanted to share this information with you. This article was a good reminder that in order to create change you need a plan. If you have a plan - a way to break your BIG goal down into smaller, attainable stages - you will have more success making the changes in your life that you want to create. Here are my thoughts on some of his tips.
#1 "THINK IT THROUGH": My biggest take away for this is that you DO NOT HAVE TO START ON JANUARY 1st. Good news for those of you who had every intention of creating a goal/resolution for this year and never started.
Allowing yourself permission to start later gives you the opportunity to think about what it is your really want. He uses the example of the person who wants to lose weight and joins a gym on January 1st, vowing to workout 5 days a week. But if you have a job, are responsible for others (kids, ailing parent) this is unrealistic. Instead, Aston suggests taking the time to do your research. Find a gym or trainer that offers classes you are interested in and has a flexible schedule that will allow you to carve out the time you need to keep your fitness goals.
Allowing yourself permission to start later gives you the opportunity to think about what it is your really want. He uses the example of the person who wants to lose weight and joins a gym on January 1st, vowing to workout 5 days a week. But if you have a job, are responsible for others (kids, ailing parent) this is unrealistic. Instead, Aston suggests taking the time to do your research. Find a gym or trainer that offers classes you are interested in and has a flexible schedule that will allow you to carve out the time you need to keep your fitness goals.
#2 BE THE SNAIL: This is a good one if you are trying to break a habit - like smoking or in my case emotional eating. What ever the habit is you're trying to break, you have probably been at it for a looong time. This tip is about realizing that changing your behavior is going to be a process - a long, slow process! It will require baby steps. Small changes over time will keep you focused and help you create the big change you want.
Using the smoking scenario, it might mean limiting the number of cigarettes you smoke in a day and gradually decreasing that number over time until you are ready to quit.
#3 PRACTICE SELF COMPASSION: Be kind to yourself. This goes back to #1 and thinking it through. If the plan you came up with isn't working DON'T GIVE UP ON THE GOAL! Come up with a new plan that will offer you opportunities for success.
#4 FIND AN ACCOUNTABILITY BUDDY: Enlist the help of someone who will help you stay on track. Someone on speed dial if you need to talk when you would normally reach for a cigarette or a cookie under stress. A gym buddy is a great way to make work outs fun and motivating. I have a group of women who I run with. We hold each other accountable to get up, show up and get our run done. I can tell you, if it weren't for the fact that I know those 4 ladies are waiting for me at the parking lot, I would easily pull the covers up and sleep in on Sunday mornings.
#5 BE AWARE OF YOUR TRIGGERS: In order to change a habit, you must know what the driving force behind your behavior is.
What is causing me to reach for a cigarette or a cookie?
Is it stress?
Boredom?
Can I replace that feeling with an action?
Some deep breathing.
A few long stretches.
A quick walk.
Being able to name the trigger and distract yourself from it can be a useful tool to create the change you are trying to create in your life.
The biggest take away in all of this is mindfulness - taking the time to take a deeper look at what you do and why you do it. Success in attaining goals comes from knowing what you want and creating a thoughtful plan for accomplishing those goals.
January 1st is just a day on the calendar.
You can create change anytime you want and are ready to put in the work in.
Today.
Tomorrow.
Next week.
However long it takes is not important.
The important thing is to start.
And recognizing that you need a change is a start.
Build your plan from there.
Using the smoking scenario, it might mean limiting the number of cigarettes you smoke in a day and gradually decreasing that number over time until you are ready to quit.
#3 PRACTICE SELF COMPASSION: Be kind to yourself. This goes back to #1 and thinking it through. If the plan you came up with isn't working DON'T GIVE UP ON THE GOAL! Come up with a new plan that will offer you opportunities for success.
#4 FIND AN ACCOUNTABILITY BUDDY: Enlist the help of someone who will help you stay on track. Someone on speed dial if you need to talk when you would normally reach for a cigarette or a cookie under stress. A gym buddy is a great way to make work outs fun and motivating. I have a group of women who I run with. We hold each other accountable to get up, show up and get our run done. I can tell you, if it weren't for the fact that I know those 4 ladies are waiting for me at the parking lot, I would easily pull the covers up and sleep in on Sunday mornings.
#5 BE AWARE OF YOUR TRIGGERS: In order to change a habit, you must know what the driving force behind your behavior is.
What is causing me to reach for a cigarette or a cookie?
Is it stress?
Boredom?
Can I replace that feeling with an action?
Some deep breathing.
A few long stretches.
A quick walk.
Being able to name the trigger and distract yourself from it can be a useful tool to create the change you are trying to create in your life.
The biggest take away in all of this is mindfulness - taking the time to take a deeper look at what you do and why you do it. Success in attaining goals comes from knowing what you want and creating a thoughtful plan for accomplishing those goals.
January 1st is just a day on the calendar.
You can create change anytime you want and are ready to put in the work in.
Today.
Tomorrow.
Next week.
However long it takes is not important.
The important thing is to start.
And recognizing that you need a change is a start.
Build your plan from there.
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