HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE
It has been such a long time since I have written anything. Oh, it wasn't for lack of trying. I have opened my computer to this page on many occasions, only to find that the words in my head (and heart) were such a jumble I couldn't sort them out enough to create a coherent post.
So as we begin this last week of 2020, I am trying once again. I am trying to focus on the positive aspects of this year. The 6 months I got to spend in New Zealand. How lucky I am that I have not lost anyone to Covid. Grateful that the people I know and love who did contract the virus survived. I set a goal to run or walk at least 1 mile every day in 2020 and will accomplish that goal (barring any unforeseen events in the next few days). As a matter of fact, I have logged well over 1400 miles this year! I have never bought so many running shoes in one year!!! I lost weight. I got faster. I got stronger. I'm feeling pretty accomplished physically. Still working on my fitness goals for 2021, but I know I want to add more variety. I recently started hiking again, and began trail running! Maybe live races will come back in the new year...here's hoping!
We are getting some things done around the house - finally! New deck is almost done. Plans are being worked on for a long overdue kitchen overhaul. Began a big landscaping project that we will finish in the spring. We go back and forth about staying or moving (it's like a real life version of Love It or List It - HGTV show). But we love this neighborhood. We love this house. It's not perfect. It never will be. But we keep coming back to it, so I'm taking that as a sign that it is where we should be.
It was a year full of changes. We had to learn to make adjustments. There was no spontaneity in our lives any more. Everything had to be planned around making sure you had a mask and allowing for quarantine time. We couldn't just grab a drink with a friend. No popping over to a neighbor's house unannounced for a cup of coffee. No last minute decision to take a long weekend. Planning in advance was required for most aspects of our lives.
So now it is the last week of the year. Many people take this time between Christmas and New Year to reflect on the past and plan for the future. Set goals. Plan vacations. Make those New Year's resolutions. But how can anyone plan for anything with so much uncertainty surrounding us. What will the new year bring? Will the vaccine really work? Will there be further restrictions put in place? More things shutting down? More small businesses closing their doors forever? How/when will things go back to the way they were before the Spring of 2020?
Nobody can answer any of these questions. The truth is, we just don't know what the future holds. But we never do! We go into every New Year not knowing what will happen in the next 12 months. I think what makes this year so different is that people are more afraid of that uncertainty. A sense of joy and wonder about what could be possible for the future is overshadowed by fear...a deep fear that we see no end in sight. No magic wand to wave to make everything OK.
And so we go into this New Year restless, weary and afraid. We miss the life we used to have. We miss our friends. We miss our families. We miss the celebration of milestones big and small. And, no pithy quote or affirmation is going make that fear go away.
This is what I plan to do going into 2021...LIVE MY BEST LIFE POSSIBLE! I cannot live in fear. That will cripple me - send me to my bed where I will pull the covers up over my head and stay there until someone gives the "all clear". Instead, I will wear a mask so that I can work, go grocery shopping and see family and friends. I will continue to take care of myself physically - watch what I eat, strength training and cardio activities everyday. Emotionally, I will take control of the things that are in my power to control and learn to let the other things go.
I wasn't going to set any goals for 2021. I didn't want to reflect back on 2020. But I changed my mind about this. I think it is important to take some time this week to acknowledge my accomplishments, acknowledge the things I miss and acknowledge the things I would like to achieve in the new year. Routines are important. And my routine at this time of year is take stock...acknowledge, reflect and look forward. Emotionally, it is important that I do this. It is a time to let things go; to make room for the new - physically and mentally.
Every year, I choose a photo or a quote to be my focus for the upcoming year. It was hard to do this year. Nothing drew me in. Nothing was resonating with the way I was feeling. And then I saw it. From my deck, I can look out onto the cove across the street. Every year, a neighbor decorates one of their boats for the holidays and anchors it in the middle of the cove. This year the boat is lit up with a giant peace sign between the masts. I look out at the peace sign everyday. I see that as my symbol for the new year. Peace of mind! Peace in my heart! Peace in our nation! Peace in our world! This is the image I hold on to. Soon the boat will be brought back to shore and the lights taken down. But I am hanging this picture that Tim took in my office. I will look at it every day and send up my silent prayer for peace for all of us.
HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE 💕